Losing those we love is never easy. It seems to happen when we least expect it to. There always seems to be things that are left unsaid. Because I live so far away from my family I tend to tell them how much I love them every time we talk to each other. Someone I admire a great deal always says "We aren't promised a tomorrow." How true that statement seems to be this week. I have several friends and acquaintances who have lost loved ones recently and all of them except two said that they wished they had said "I love you," just one more time. They were just wishing for one more day. I posted as my status today "Hug those you love TODAY. Tell them that you love them TODAY. We don't know what tomorrow will bring."
There are a couple of people that I wish I could hug this week, because I would. Distance keeps me from doing that so I'm trying to check in with them daily. Virtual hugs, and words of encouragement are the things I can give them when I can't be right there to hold their hand or share time over a cup of coffee like we used to when I lived closer. The point is, I might not be there physically, but I'm right there heart to heart with them as best I can be.
When those we love are taken from us, expected or not, part of us goes with them. I think that's why it hurts so much. You know how when you were a kid and you scrapped up your knees when you fell roller skating or wiped out on your bike? How much it hurt to leave part of you on that sidewalk? I think that's what happens when we lose those we love. They take a part of us with them, and leave that nasty road rash behind. It hurts, it stings, it bleeds and weeps. It's not until the scab forms that things begin to feel better. Sometimes it's a week, sometimes longer. Our friends and loved ones that come along side of us and hold us up and love on us with words and actions form that scab and helps our hearts to heal.
Sometimes those that we've loved and lost come back to us somehow to let us know all is well. I remember when my dear friend Rose died. She was all alone in a strange hospital far away. She wasn't strong enough to recover from her surgery and she passed away during the night. When I was out walking my dog before work, I happened to glance up to the heavens. At that very moment, the most beautiful shooting start streaked across the inky black sky. It was beautiful. Silvery and full of sparkle, just like my friend Rose. When I got to work I learned that she had passed away just about the time I saw that star. It gave me goosebumps, but somehow I knew she was in a better place. About two weeks after that she walked right into a dream I was having. Looked right at me and said, "Wendi I'm ok. I feel so much better. I'm going to play golf today," and then she was gone. Before she left for her surgery I hugged her and told her I loved her and that I'd pray for her . I was so glad I did.
As Jon Mayer sings "Say what you need to say, It's better to say too much than to leave things left unsaid." Don't be afraid to tell those you love how you feel. You will be so glad you did. Peace.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Almost Fifty
This is the year that I turn fifty. Initially, this was not a pleasant thought, and then I looked around me. What I found were plenty of women who seemed to have survived their fiftieth year and actually thrived through it. It just doesn't seem enough to say survived...thrived is much better. So from time to time I'll be shouting out to my "fellow fifty females" to fill their half full glasses to totally full with whatever I can.
A few weeks ago I was getting my nails done and there was another lady in the salon who was just about to celebrate her fiftieth birthday in a matter of days. I asked her if she was doing anything special to mark the occasion, and her reply was "Are you kidding me? No, I'm not ready for this and I'm certainly not going to celebrate it." I silently thought to myself, "what a shame." To me she looked healthy, really attractive, and well dressed. If I had known her a little better I might have asked her why she was so upset. But instead I decided right then and there NOT to be that lady this year.
In the past few weeks I've thought about some things that I'd like to do to make this year special and there were four really big things that stood out. Run a marathon, buy a house, go on a mission trip to a foreign country, and move towards writing for a living. I decided that running a marathon was probably a long shot for this year due to other issues, so I've put that on the docket for next year. Buying a house is entirely possible, but I want to make sure it's the right house in the right place. So that has also been put off for the end of this year. Moving towards writing for a living, is already under way, although I'm not quite ready to quit my real job just yet. Which leaves going on a mission trip to a foreign country. That seems to be the "BINGO."
So this year to mark my big birthday, that's what I'm going to do. Looks like it will either be August or October, and I'm not sure what I'll be doing, but I do know that it will be a wonderful way to commemorate my first 50 years. I'll be giving back to others, using my knowledge and experience to bring joy to those who are struggling. I'd really like to work with children because they are so important to our future here on earth. Maybe if I do that they will remember when they grow up that someone cared enough to travel a great distance to make a difference in their life. Isn't that what we're supposed to do? I work right here at home too, giving back to folks that are less fortunate. I'm looking at the wider world. I need to set a good example for the "world citizen" that lives right in my own house. She needs to know that it's important to do something kind for those who are not right in front of her. There are people all over this planet that live day to day with far less than we could ever imagine, yet they fight the good fight and smile.
I'll keep you informed on how all this works out because I will need your prayers and support - I'm going to a place that has no electricity which means no hair dryer, but I don't care. I'll make do, and I'll have fun, just doing some little bit of good in this world and maybe even making some little children smile. Sounds like the best birthday celebration ever! Cheers!
A few weeks ago I was getting my nails done and there was another lady in the salon who was just about to celebrate her fiftieth birthday in a matter of days. I asked her if she was doing anything special to mark the occasion, and her reply was "Are you kidding me? No, I'm not ready for this and I'm certainly not going to celebrate it." I silently thought to myself, "what a shame." To me she looked healthy, really attractive, and well dressed. If I had known her a little better I might have asked her why she was so upset. But instead I decided right then and there NOT to be that lady this year.
In the past few weeks I've thought about some things that I'd like to do to make this year special and there were four really big things that stood out. Run a marathon, buy a house, go on a mission trip to a foreign country, and move towards writing for a living. I decided that running a marathon was probably a long shot for this year due to other issues, so I've put that on the docket for next year. Buying a house is entirely possible, but I want to make sure it's the right house in the right place. So that has also been put off for the end of this year. Moving towards writing for a living, is already under way, although I'm not quite ready to quit my real job just yet. Which leaves going on a mission trip to a foreign country. That seems to be the "BINGO."
So this year to mark my big birthday, that's what I'm going to do. Looks like it will either be August or October, and I'm not sure what I'll be doing, but I do know that it will be a wonderful way to commemorate my first 50 years. I'll be giving back to others, using my knowledge and experience to bring joy to those who are struggling. I'd really like to work with children because they are so important to our future here on earth. Maybe if I do that they will remember when they grow up that someone cared enough to travel a great distance to make a difference in their life. Isn't that what we're supposed to do? I work right here at home too, giving back to folks that are less fortunate. I'm looking at the wider world. I need to set a good example for the "world citizen" that lives right in my own house. She needs to know that it's important to do something kind for those who are not right in front of her. There are people all over this planet that live day to day with far less than we could ever imagine, yet they fight the good fight and smile.
I'll keep you informed on how all this works out because I will need your prayers and support - I'm going to a place that has no electricity which means no hair dryer, but I don't care. I'll make do, and I'll have fun, just doing some little bit of good in this world and maybe even making some little children smile. Sounds like the best birthday celebration ever! Cheers!
Monday, January 23, 2012
Be a Courageous Parent
I saw a great movie over the weekend. It was one of those movies that you watch pretty closely because you are so drawn into the story that you can't quit watching it. It gave me a lot to think about when it was done. Sometimes that's not really what we want from a movie, but this was actually a good thing. The movie that I'm talking about is "Courageous." If you are a parent, especially a father, weather you are a new father or not so new, you should sit down and watch this movie. Now I don't mean, to sit there and watch it and forget about it, I mean sit there and watch it, and maybe take something away from it and act on what you took away from it. As a single parent, I am trying to figure out what I took away from this movie and what I'm going to do about it.
This movie was about 6 men who work for the Sheriff's department in their town. They are all fathers and to dang busy being big shots to take an active roll in their kids lives, then something tragic happens and the story spins in another direction. There's also a man who is also a father who has fallen on hard times, and he asks God to help him. Without giving away the story too much, there's a lot of praying going on in this movie, and for some people that will be a turn off, don't let it be. Give this movie a chance. The message is a good one.
What I took away from this movie is that if you are a parent, you need to step up and be an active participant in your children's lives - God loans them to us for just a short while and before we know it they are all grown up and gone. What we have to figure out is what we want our kids to take with them when they leave us. Are we going to send them off into the world well equipped to face whatever comes at them including some faith based knowledge, or are we going to send them out into the world with the bare minimum and no knowledge of whatever higher power you believe in? I think you know the answer to that.
The men in this movie made a commitment to both their families and God to be the best fathers they could possibly be. In this day and time when things seem to be going to hell in a hand-basket it was a breath of fresh air. Now I'm going to ask the question that I know you know is coming. I wonder what would happen if those of us who are parents of impressionable age children, took a little bit of time each day and committed that time to doing something with our kids - even if it's just chatting while doing the dinner dishes. Really listening to them when they talk to us about their day or about whatever they feel is important to them. I have decided that I'm going to take a cue from this very fine film and write my own Resolution to be a better more active parent. I want to equip my daughter with the things I feel are important for her to take out into the world with her. Won't you do the same for your children? The movie is called "Courageous"- I suggest you watch it with your family the next time you are looking for a good thought provoking, conversation starting movie. Now pass the popcorn! Cheers!
This movie was about 6 men who work for the Sheriff's department in their town. They are all fathers and to dang busy being big shots to take an active roll in their kids lives, then something tragic happens and the story spins in another direction. There's also a man who is also a father who has fallen on hard times, and he asks God to help him. Without giving away the story too much, there's a lot of praying going on in this movie, and for some people that will be a turn off, don't let it be. Give this movie a chance. The message is a good one.
What I took away from this movie is that if you are a parent, you need to step up and be an active participant in your children's lives - God loans them to us for just a short while and before we know it they are all grown up and gone. What we have to figure out is what we want our kids to take with them when they leave us. Are we going to send them off into the world well equipped to face whatever comes at them including some faith based knowledge, or are we going to send them out into the world with the bare minimum and no knowledge of whatever higher power you believe in? I think you know the answer to that.
The men in this movie made a commitment to both their families and God to be the best fathers they could possibly be. In this day and time when things seem to be going to hell in a hand-basket it was a breath of fresh air. Now I'm going to ask the question that I know you know is coming. I wonder what would happen if those of us who are parents of impressionable age children, took a little bit of time each day and committed that time to doing something with our kids - even if it's just chatting while doing the dinner dishes. Really listening to them when they talk to us about their day or about whatever they feel is important to them. I have decided that I'm going to take a cue from this very fine film and write my own Resolution to be a better more active parent. I want to equip my daughter with the things I feel are important for her to take out into the world with her. Won't you do the same for your children? The movie is called "Courageous"- I suggest you watch it with your family the next time you are looking for a good thought provoking, conversation starting movie. Now pass the popcorn! Cheers!
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Saying You're Sorry
When you do or say things that you realize were wrong or that you are not proud of, it's probably best to say you are sorry. ~Wendi
The quote above is my own. I came up with it today while I was sitting in Kaysie's martial arts class. I had a rather unpleasant experience last night and I chimed in on something I probably shouldn't have. At the time I felt offended by what this person said and accused someone else of. Any of my friends will tell you, that I am a very loyal person, and if I feel that someone is coming under fire, unjustly, I'm going to say something. Well, that's what happened and that's what I did. I had several "likes" under both of my comments and then this morning, when I got up, I had a very different feeling. I read another comment that someone else made and it stopped me dead. When I stopped to think about the things I wrote I realized that maybe this other person was correct, and as I scrolled through the comments I realized that I had gotten caught up in the heat of the moment, and did not bother to engage my brain. This person that the ugly comments referred to is one of the kindest, most thoughtful people I know. However, when someone "flames" her on line she usually takes care of business, and she did in a very kind way. I would have expected nothing less.
After a little reflection I thought maybe I should say something, and then I engaged my brain, and thought, just take your comments off. I thought that if I said anything more it would just fan the flames. So I went in and removed my comments. I also wrote to the person that the ugly comments were directed at because I felt that I owed her an apology for behaving badly on her page. I'm not proud of how I reacted last night, but I am human, so therefore I say "I was wrong and I'm sorry." It's only when we don't hold ourselves accountable for our actions that we get into big trouble.
I hope that if you ever do something or say something that you aren't proud of, you have the courage to apologize. It's never easy to admit that you were wrong, but in the long run it's the right thing to do.
Have a good weekend!
The quote above is my own. I came up with it today while I was sitting in Kaysie's martial arts class. I had a rather unpleasant experience last night and I chimed in on something I probably shouldn't have. At the time I felt offended by what this person said and accused someone else of. Any of my friends will tell you, that I am a very loyal person, and if I feel that someone is coming under fire, unjustly, I'm going to say something. Well, that's what happened and that's what I did. I had several "likes" under both of my comments and then this morning, when I got up, I had a very different feeling. I read another comment that someone else made and it stopped me dead. When I stopped to think about the things I wrote I realized that maybe this other person was correct, and as I scrolled through the comments I realized that I had gotten caught up in the heat of the moment, and did not bother to engage my brain. This person that the ugly comments referred to is one of the kindest, most thoughtful people I know. However, when someone "flames" her on line she usually takes care of business, and she did in a very kind way. I would have expected nothing less.
After a little reflection I thought maybe I should say something, and then I engaged my brain, and thought, just take your comments off. I thought that if I said anything more it would just fan the flames. So I went in and removed my comments. I also wrote to the person that the ugly comments were directed at because I felt that I owed her an apology for behaving badly on her page. I'm not proud of how I reacted last night, but I am human, so therefore I say "I was wrong and I'm sorry." It's only when we don't hold ourselves accountable for our actions that we get into big trouble.
I hope that if you ever do something or say something that you aren't proud of, you have the courage to apologize. It's never easy to admit that you were wrong, but in the long run it's the right thing to do.
Have a good weekend!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Chocolate Chip Cookies - The Torch Has Been Passed
When I was growing up my mom's best friend made the world's best chocolate chip cookies. She always gifted my mom a whole tin full of them for Christmas every year. Sadly, my mother wasn't fond of sharing them, and as soon as they came in the house they were hidden away. I get it, they were for my mom, but something that good needs to be shared! I've never been able to duplicate those wonderful cookies, but I started a tradition of my own.
From the time my daughter was old enough to stand on a chair at our kitchen counter we have made chocolate chip cookies together. I think the first time we made those cookies together Kaysie was probably about three years old. She loved to dump the ingredients into the bowl. That was her first job. When she was a little older she got to measure the ingredients and then dump them in the bowl. Then there was the lessons on how to crack and egg and not get shell into the batter, quickly followed by the fractions of the measurements. For the longest time she was good until it came time to spoon the dough on the cookie sheets. She decided a long time ago that was a boring job so, she would do her thing and I would do the rest.
Last night the torch was passed. Last night my eleven year old daughter made her first batch of chocolate chip cookies from start to finish and I mean from start to finish. She gathered her equipment, ingredients and went to town. I have to say, those are some darn fine chocolate chip cookies. They were a beautiful golden brown and the chocolate chips were melty and delicious. Sheet after glorious sheet came out of the oven and our little apartment smelled wonderful. I only acted as the clean up crew and surprisingly enough, she even helped clean up. I was so proud of my girl. This has been something that we have enjoyed doing together for a very long time. She will be getting a little shrinky-dink cookie badge for her apron this week and we will move on to our next baking project.
I wouldn't trade the hours we have spent baking cookies together for anything. It has always been a happy time spent laughing and chatting and just enjoying each other's company. I hope everyone out there reading tonight has a similar memory with their mom, grandmother or favorite aunt. Hopefully when my daughter has children of her own she will teach them to bake chocolate chip cookies and enjoy that time together. Below is the recipe that we like to use. I hope you can make a batch and enjoy them with your children! Cheers!
Classic Chocolate Chip Cookies
From the time my daughter was old enough to stand on a chair at our kitchen counter we have made chocolate chip cookies together. I think the first time we made those cookies together Kaysie was probably about three years old. She loved to dump the ingredients into the bowl. That was her first job. When she was a little older she got to measure the ingredients and then dump them in the bowl. Then there was the lessons on how to crack and egg and not get shell into the batter, quickly followed by the fractions of the measurements. For the longest time she was good until it came time to spoon the dough on the cookie sheets. She decided a long time ago that was a boring job so, she would do her thing and I would do the rest.
Last night the torch was passed. Last night my eleven year old daughter made her first batch of chocolate chip cookies from start to finish and I mean from start to finish. She gathered her equipment, ingredients and went to town. I have to say, those are some darn fine chocolate chip cookies. They were a beautiful golden brown and the chocolate chips were melty and delicious. Sheet after glorious sheet came out of the oven and our little apartment smelled wonderful. I only acted as the clean up crew and surprisingly enough, she even helped clean up. I was so proud of my girl. This has been something that we have enjoyed doing together for a very long time. She will be getting a little shrinky-dink cookie badge for her apron this week and we will move on to our next baking project.
I wouldn't trade the hours we have spent baking cookies together for anything. It has always been a happy time spent laughing and chatting and just enjoying each other's company. I hope everyone out there reading tonight has a similar memory with their mom, grandmother or favorite aunt. Hopefully when my daughter has children of her own she will teach them to bake chocolate chip cookies and enjoy that time together. Below is the recipe that we like to use. I hope you can make a batch and enjoy them with your children! Cheers!
Classic Chocolate Chip Cookies
Recipe:
1 stick of Margerine 2 ¼ cups flour
½ cup of shortening 1 tsp. baking soda
¾ cup packed brown sugar ½ tsp. salt
¾ cup granulated sugar 1 bag Hershey’s Milk Choc. Chips
1 tsp. vanilla
2 eggs
1. Pre-heat oven to 335 degrees F. Line 2 cookie sheets with heavy duty foil.
2. Beat margarine, shortening, sugars and vanilla together with an electric mixer until creamy. Add eggs one at a time. Beating well in between each egg.
3. Combine flour, baking soda & salt in separate bowl.
4. Gradually add flour mixture to shortening and sugar mixture until well combined.
5. Add chocolate chips and stir by hand.
6. Drop cookie dough by rounded tsp. onto ungreased foil lined cookie sheets. Very carefully place cookie sheet on the middle rack of the oven. Use your potholders or oven mitts to prevent burning yourself.
7. Bake cookies for 12 -13 minutes or until golden brown. Set your oven timer so your cookies don’t burn. Using potholders or oven mitts, very carefully remove cookie sheets from the oven and place on a hot plate or kitchen towel. Get an adult to help you if you need to, burns are no fun!
8. Cool cookies on cookie sheet for approximately 5 minutes to allow them to firm up a bit. Moved cooled cookies to wire rack.
9. Refill cookie sheets with more dough and keep baking!
10. Store completely cooled cookies in a cookie jar or plastic container. Enjoy!
Monday, January 16, 2012
Snow Days
Remember when you were a kid and snow was in the forecast? I sure do. I remember how excited I would get. I'd be up and down all night long, peeking...hoping and wishing for enough snow to cancel school. In the town that I grew up in, it didn't take much, just a few flakes and some well placed slipperiness on the roads, and BINGO....snow day!! I remember I would wake up a little early and lay in bed waiting for the school closure/delay announcements. How exciting it was when the good news came that school was cancelled for the day! By then I would be too charged up to go back to sleep unless I had truly been up most of the night, then I would roll over underneath those warm covers and sleep a while longer. Those were the days.
When I graduated from nursing school I stayed on in Winchester (VA) and worked at the hospital. Our winters there were very snowy. My senior year in nursing school we got back to back storms over Christmas break and ended up with almost 3 feet of snow before it was all done. I was lucky that year. I didn't have to go to work, but I heard that the National Guard post soldiers went around and picked up nurses and physicians in Hummers so they could get to their patients at the hospital. My first winter working I remember it being particularly snowy. Lucky me, I owned a Jeep wrangler with 4 wheel drive. No snow days for me. I remember driving to work one snowy morning, listening to the school closure announcements (which still make me smile for the kids who are off). School had been cancelled for the day, and I remember thinking, "the kids in this town have no idea how lucky they are..." I get to go to work. Sigh, the plight of a responsible adult.
Yesterday here in Portland, we had a little snow. I woke up early, took the dog out, and it had just started falling. I went in and made coffee and curled up in my favorite chair. I opened the curtains and blinds, and just savored the view. It was just beautiful. I had a fire in the fireplace and was all tucked in just enjoying some quiet time watching the beauty before me. Almost two hours later it was finished for the first round. Then while watching football it started again, this time the flakes were HUGE and fluffy. In about 20 minutes or so the ground was covered and the winter wonderland was back. This time my daughter dashed out the door to enjoy it, but as quickly as it came it was gone. Then this morning...the ground was covered again. No satisfaction though, the kids had the day off already.
Sometimes I long for those days from childhood. Wishing for a day to roll over for another little snooze and then playing in the snow all day and sipping cocoa afterwards. Those were certainly good times. So happy and not a care in the world. No worries of bills or getting in enough hours at work. Maybe we all need a "snow day" every now and then. Maybe the educators in our country who make such decisions have the right idea. A day to play worry free. If you have a snow day soon, throw a snow ball, build a snowman or go sledding just for fun! Who knows we might see each other. Cheers!
When I graduated from nursing school I stayed on in Winchester (VA) and worked at the hospital. Our winters there were very snowy. My senior year in nursing school we got back to back storms over Christmas break and ended up with almost 3 feet of snow before it was all done. I was lucky that year. I didn't have to go to work, but I heard that the National Guard post soldiers went around and picked up nurses and physicians in Hummers so they could get to their patients at the hospital. My first winter working I remember it being particularly snowy. Lucky me, I owned a Jeep wrangler with 4 wheel drive. No snow days for me. I remember driving to work one snowy morning, listening to the school closure announcements (which still make me smile for the kids who are off). School had been cancelled for the day, and I remember thinking, "the kids in this town have no idea how lucky they are..." I get to go to work. Sigh, the plight of a responsible adult.
Yesterday here in Portland, we had a little snow. I woke up early, took the dog out, and it had just started falling. I went in and made coffee and curled up in my favorite chair. I opened the curtains and blinds, and just savored the view. It was just beautiful. I had a fire in the fireplace and was all tucked in just enjoying some quiet time watching the beauty before me. Almost two hours later it was finished for the first round. Then while watching football it started again, this time the flakes were HUGE and fluffy. In about 20 minutes or so the ground was covered and the winter wonderland was back. This time my daughter dashed out the door to enjoy it, but as quickly as it came it was gone. Then this morning...the ground was covered again. No satisfaction though, the kids had the day off already.
Sometimes I long for those days from childhood. Wishing for a day to roll over for another little snooze and then playing in the snow all day and sipping cocoa afterwards. Those were certainly good times. So happy and not a care in the world. No worries of bills or getting in enough hours at work. Maybe we all need a "snow day" every now and then. Maybe the educators in our country who make such decisions have the right idea. A day to play worry free. If you have a snow day soon, throw a snow ball, build a snowman or go sledding just for fun! Who knows we might see each other. Cheers!
Friday, January 13, 2012
Being Happy Not Perfect
"Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect. It just means that you are willing to look past the imperfections." Unknown
What does being happy mean to you? I found this quote on my facebook newsfeed this morning. I've thought about it all day and I'm thinking that this is what being happy might mean to me. Life is rarely perfect, but I think when you are willing to look past the parts that aren't perfect, that is when you have the opportunity to enjoy life for what it is. I think sometimes we expect too much, and that's when we get into trouble. We let our desire for perfection get in our way and we are blinded to the possibilities that come with imperfection.
One of the things that I would love to do someday is buy an old house in the country and fix it up. My mother thinks I'm nuts. "Wouldn't you rather have something that is brand new? That no one has lived in? In other words, a "perfect" house. My answer is, "No not really." What fun would that be? It would be nice, certainly, but fixing up something would be more fun. I'd be willing to look past the imperfections of an old house and fix it up just the way I want it. That would make me happy. I'm getting ready to experience life in a brand new home this year, I hope. The old "fixer upper" is going to have to wait a while. That will be my project for when I'm ready to write full time.
The other thing I tend to look past the imperfections in are dogs. I make no excuses for some of the wacky dogs that have been a part of my life. I've loved every single one of them. When I graduated from nursing school I became the proud owner of a mixed breed dog (Chow Lab) named Denali. Those of you who knew Denali, knew what a special girl she was. She was the sweetest dog in the world, but the smarts in both breeds cancelled each other out and she was just silly. Then there was Abby Noodle my daughter's first dog - we adopted Abby when she was 13 years old. She was the sweetest old girl ever. My favorite Abby Noodle story is the first time my mom visited us after we adopted Abby. I called home to see how everyone was doing and my mom said that Abby would just whine and whine at her. She said she tried feeding her, taking her out and the dog continued to whine. Then I asked my mom where are you? She said she was sitting on the sofa. I asked my mom, "Well, did you invite Abby up to sit with you and Kaysie?" The answer was no, but as soon as she did the whining stopped. The third most memorable dog was Chloe - a big old black lab who I discovered much to my dismay, had a HORRIBLE case of separation anxiety. She totally demolished the interior of my car, but I loved her anyhow. The point is, they might not have been perfect, but their sweet personalities made me happy to overlook what other people may not have tolerated.
What are the things in your life that aren't perfect, but bring you joy and happiness? Do you have things that you'd like to do that would make you happy? Look past the imperfections and accept the possibilities. I'll bet you find the contentment and happiness that you've been looking for. Cheers!
What does being happy mean to you? I found this quote on my facebook newsfeed this morning. I've thought about it all day and I'm thinking that this is what being happy might mean to me. Life is rarely perfect, but I think when you are willing to look past the parts that aren't perfect, that is when you have the opportunity to enjoy life for what it is. I think sometimes we expect too much, and that's when we get into trouble. We let our desire for perfection get in our way and we are blinded to the possibilities that come with imperfection.
One of the things that I would love to do someday is buy an old house in the country and fix it up. My mother thinks I'm nuts. "Wouldn't you rather have something that is brand new? That no one has lived in? In other words, a "perfect" house. My answer is, "No not really." What fun would that be? It would be nice, certainly, but fixing up something would be more fun. I'd be willing to look past the imperfections of an old house and fix it up just the way I want it. That would make me happy. I'm getting ready to experience life in a brand new home this year, I hope. The old "fixer upper" is going to have to wait a while. That will be my project for when I'm ready to write full time.
The other thing I tend to look past the imperfections in are dogs. I make no excuses for some of the wacky dogs that have been a part of my life. I've loved every single one of them. When I graduated from nursing school I became the proud owner of a mixed breed dog (Chow Lab) named Denali. Those of you who knew Denali, knew what a special girl she was. She was the sweetest dog in the world, but the smarts in both breeds cancelled each other out and she was just silly. Then there was Abby Noodle my daughter's first dog - we adopted Abby when she was 13 years old. She was the sweetest old girl ever. My favorite Abby Noodle story is the first time my mom visited us after we adopted Abby. I called home to see how everyone was doing and my mom said that Abby would just whine and whine at her. She said she tried feeding her, taking her out and the dog continued to whine. Then I asked my mom where are you? She said she was sitting on the sofa. I asked my mom, "Well, did you invite Abby up to sit with you and Kaysie?" The answer was no, but as soon as she did the whining stopped. The third most memorable dog was Chloe - a big old black lab who I discovered much to my dismay, had a HORRIBLE case of separation anxiety. She totally demolished the interior of my car, but I loved her anyhow. The point is, they might not have been perfect, but their sweet personalities made me happy to overlook what other people may not have tolerated.
What are the things in your life that aren't perfect, but bring you joy and happiness? Do you have things that you'd like to do that would make you happy? Look past the imperfections and accept the possibilities. I'll bet you find the contentment and happiness that you've been looking for. Cheers!
Thursday, January 12, 2012
The Voyage Begins
"Challenge yourself today to step out of your comfort zone, and be bold! To love fully and to give of yourself without reservation!" ~Delilah
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
~Mark Twain
Delilah posted this as her status on her facebook page this morning. I have to say that I really like the message here. I think too often we are satisfied to stay where we are comfortable. We like things to stay the same, don't rock the boat, stay in the harbor where it is safe. Where the winds of change cannot catch in the sails of life. If we stay in the safe harbor too long we begin to grow crusty with the barnacles of fear. We also cannot learn to manage the storms that life often throws our way. That cannot be good. I have written about change a lot over the last year. I have learned in my life to be flexible and to try and roll with the waves and face the storms head on. It's not an easy thing to do, but when you look back it's an amazing sight to see where you came from
This year I am turning 50. When I think about that I wonder, where in the world has time gone? What really, have I accomplished in my adult life, other than nursing school and being a parent? The sad truth is not a lot. I have been on a "journey" for the last few months. I haven't talked a lot about it because I didn't know where it was going to lead me. Tomorrow that journey will end and a new one will begin. To be honest, I'm a little hesitant to talk about it, but I want to honor my friend Delilah and one of my favorite authors Mark Twain and be true to what was spoken to me this morning. So here goes...
Back in October shortly before leaving on my vacation I decided that my life was all wrong. Almost every decision I had made in my adult life benefited me somehow. When I looked back at how fast the last ten years had gone and what had transpired over those years I was ashamed. I was ashamed at how I lived my life. I was living in the "Wendi Universe" where I was at the center and everything else and everyone else revolved around me. I didn't feel good about that at all. So I decided, as my good friend Dr. Michelle Watson would say, to "change the dance." I had heard Delilah mention the book The Purpose Driven Life, by Rick Warren on her radio show, and what a wonderful book it was. So I went to Amazon.com and downloaded it onto my kindle and iPad. I also picked up the journal that goes with it, and thus began my journey. Early on I also figured out that one of the reasons why I was living the way I was living was because I was afraid, so I also started reading Fearless by Max Lucado. I actually looked at that book when I picked up the journal and decided that it would be a worthy accompaniment. I also knew that in addition to finding some purpose in my life I needed to make some changes in how I thought about others. I had also looked at book called One Simple Act by Debbie Macomber in which she speaks to taking small steps in becoming a more generous person by highlighting what people that she has met throughout her life have done. So I had my work cut out for me.
Don't get the wrong idea here. As I write this I'm thinking "Whoa Sister! This sounds bad! What in the world were you doing?" The answer is that my situation probably wasn't as bad as it could have been, had I not stopped to think about my actions. I think a little self-reflection every now and again is a really good thing. We can avoid a world of trouble by putting on the brakes in our lives and looking at the direction our actions are taking us. I have taken my time on this journey. I have stopped and started, spent time pondering some of the lessons that each book had to teach me. I've journaled A LOT, and some things I've hinted at right here in my blog. What I have learned on this journey is that everyone is put on this earth to accomplish something, and that we must do so without fear and with a generous heart. It doesn't matter what Higher Power you believe in, the message is universal. Tomorrow I finish up the journey of "purpose," and begin the "journey of discovery."
I will be stepping out of my comfort zone tomorrow to begin an amazing voyage, where I am not at the center, but I will be putting others at the center of this journey. It will be my purpose to do all I can to take the many blessings that I have been given and share them with the world around me without reservation. I don't know where this will take me, but I know that it will be worth all that I have put into it just getting ready. Mr. Twain & Delilah, I am throwing off those bowlines at about 5:00 tomorrow morning and setting sail into the rest of my life. I'm hoping for a gentle wind to lead me out to sea to meet and discover the "something" that I will accomplish. Cheers!
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
~Mark Twain
Delilah posted this as her status on her facebook page this morning. I have to say that I really like the message here. I think too often we are satisfied to stay where we are comfortable. We like things to stay the same, don't rock the boat, stay in the harbor where it is safe. Where the winds of change cannot catch in the sails of life. If we stay in the safe harbor too long we begin to grow crusty with the barnacles of fear. We also cannot learn to manage the storms that life often throws our way. That cannot be good. I have written about change a lot over the last year. I have learned in my life to be flexible and to try and roll with the waves and face the storms head on. It's not an easy thing to do, but when you look back it's an amazing sight to see where you came from
This year I am turning 50. When I think about that I wonder, where in the world has time gone? What really, have I accomplished in my adult life, other than nursing school and being a parent? The sad truth is not a lot. I have been on a "journey" for the last few months. I haven't talked a lot about it because I didn't know where it was going to lead me. Tomorrow that journey will end and a new one will begin. To be honest, I'm a little hesitant to talk about it, but I want to honor my friend Delilah and one of my favorite authors Mark Twain and be true to what was spoken to me this morning. So here goes...
Back in October shortly before leaving on my vacation I decided that my life was all wrong. Almost every decision I had made in my adult life benefited me somehow. When I looked back at how fast the last ten years had gone and what had transpired over those years I was ashamed. I was ashamed at how I lived my life. I was living in the "Wendi Universe" where I was at the center and everything else and everyone else revolved around me. I didn't feel good about that at all. So I decided, as my good friend Dr. Michelle Watson would say, to "change the dance." I had heard Delilah mention the book The Purpose Driven Life, by Rick Warren on her radio show, and what a wonderful book it was. So I went to Amazon.com and downloaded it onto my kindle and iPad. I also picked up the journal that goes with it, and thus began my journey. Early on I also figured out that one of the reasons why I was living the way I was living was because I was afraid, so I also started reading Fearless by Max Lucado. I actually looked at that book when I picked up the journal and decided that it would be a worthy accompaniment. I also knew that in addition to finding some purpose in my life I needed to make some changes in how I thought about others. I had also looked at book called One Simple Act by Debbie Macomber in which she speaks to taking small steps in becoming a more generous person by highlighting what people that she has met throughout her life have done. So I had my work cut out for me.
Don't get the wrong idea here. As I write this I'm thinking "Whoa Sister! This sounds bad! What in the world were you doing?" The answer is that my situation probably wasn't as bad as it could have been, had I not stopped to think about my actions. I think a little self-reflection every now and again is a really good thing. We can avoid a world of trouble by putting on the brakes in our lives and looking at the direction our actions are taking us. I have taken my time on this journey. I have stopped and started, spent time pondering some of the lessons that each book had to teach me. I've journaled A LOT, and some things I've hinted at right here in my blog. What I have learned on this journey is that everyone is put on this earth to accomplish something, and that we must do so without fear and with a generous heart. It doesn't matter what Higher Power you believe in, the message is universal. Tomorrow I finish up the journey of "purpose," and begin the "journey of discovery."
I will be stepping out of my comfort zone tomorrow to begin an amazing voyage, where I am not at the center, but I will be putting others at the center of this journey. It will be my purpose to do all I can to take the many blessings that I have been given and share them with the world around me without reservation. I don't know where this will take me, but I know that it will be worth all that I have put into it just getting ready. Mr. Twain & Delilah, I am throwing off those bowlines at about 5:00 tomorrow morning and setting sail into the rest of my life. I'm hoping for a gentle wind to lead me out to sea to meet and discover the "something" that I will accomplish. Cheers!
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Everybody's Aunt Dot
Today would have been my grandmother's 103rd birthday. She's been gone a long time (20 years) and not a day goes by that I don't think about her. I'm reading a book by Debbie Macomber called God's Guest List, and in it she talks about how God sends people into our lives for a reason. Today, I read about how family members impact our lives, and the first person I thought of was my grandmother. She was a huge influence for me. I chose to become a nurse because of her. She left home against her mother's wishes to go to nursing school. Her dad took her to Philadelphia and dropped her off at Jefferson. She died before I graduated, which made me sad, because she was very excited that I had decided to take that path, my mother, not so much. History was repeating itself a little bit. But, once I got going my mother was very supportive. When I graduated instead of ordering a pin from my nursing school I asked my mom for my grandmother's nursing school pin. When I was pinned at graduation, I was pinned with her pin. I still have that pin, I wear it every time I go on a job interview. Interestingly enough, I've been offered each position where I wore that pin, with the exception of one. I still got that position, the interview was a spur of the moment thing and I didn't have her pin with me.
My grandmother was a wonderful human being. She was a devoted mother, and grandmother. She loved us all very much and we loved and treasured her. She loved her profession and she was amazing. My grandfather died when my mom and my aunt were pretty young. I think my Uncle was in the service when his dad died, so he wasn't living at home. My grandmother was working in the operating room working nights. She'd come home and get my aunt and my mom off to school, sleep for a few hours and be ready to help with homework, and get dinner and then start all over again. After my grandfather died, she became the school nurse so that she could have a more regular schedule and her summers free when my mom and my aunt were out of school. That was the job that I remember her doing and doing all of her good works through.
She wasn't just the school nurse. She was "Aunt Dot" to just about every kid in town. She kept a clothes closet in her office. She made mittens, hats and scarves and kept them in her office, as well as spare jeans, pants, shirts, sweaters, coats and shoes. She knew that somebody would come to school without. She was a wonderful listener and advocate for those kids who needed her. I'm sure that more than once she stood up to some parent who was taking too firm a hand to their child. I can see her now. She was small, but mighty. I wouldn't tangle with her, because when she got her back up about something...just look out! Her heart was large and full of love for just about everybody, and she hated injustice. During segregation she was the only nurse who would go to the little school where the black kids went. Those kids deserved to have a nurse and she was more than willing to step up. I think if there had been medical mission trips back then, she would have done that too.
I feel her presence everyday. Every now and then she'll pass through my dreams at night. I think she just wants me to know that she's still around. I'm happy that she is on my "guest list," and that I feel her in the person I have grown up to be. I am honored to share my profession with her and I think she would be amazed at how much nursing has changed over the years - even since I graduated back in the 90's. So Happy Birthday Dorothy! Tonight I raise my glass to you and your wonderful life! Cheers!
My grandmother was a wonderful human being. She was a devoted mother, and grandmother. She loved us all very much and we loved and treasured her. She loved her profession and she was amazing. My grandfather died when my mom and my aunt were pretty young. I think my Uncle was in the service when his dad died, so he wasn't living at home. My grandmother was working in the operating room working nights. She'd come home and get my aunt and my mom off to school, sleep for a few hours and be ready to help with homework, and get dinner and then start all over again. After my grandfather died, she became the school nurse so that she could have a more regular schedule and her summers free when my mom and my aunt were out of school. That was the job that I remember her doing and doing all of her good works through.
She wasn't just the school nurse. She was "Aunt Dot" to just about every kid in town. She kept a clothes closet in her office. She made mittens, hats and scarves and kept them in her office, as well as spare jeans, pants, shirts, sweaters, coats and shoes. She knew that somebody would come to school without. She was a wonderful listener and advocate for those kids who needed her. I'm sure that more than once she stood up to some parent who was taking too firm a hand to their child. I can see her now. She was small, but mighty. I wouldn't tangle with her, because when she got her back up about something...just look out! Her heart was large and full of love for just about everybody, and she hated injustice. During segregation she was the only nurse who would go to the little school where the black kids went. Those kids deserved to have a nurse and she was more than willing to step up. I think if there had been medical mission trips back then, she would have done that too.
I feel her presence everyday. Every now and then she'll pass through my dreams at night. I think she just wants me to know that she's still around. I'm happy that she is on my "guest list," and that I feel her in the person I have grown up to be. I am honored to share my profession with her and I think she would be amazed at how much nursing has changed over the years - even since I graduated back in the 90's. So Happy Birthday Dorothy! Tonight I raise my glass to you and your wonderful life! Cheers!
Monday, January 9, 2012
A Single Mother's Wish
Today I was home with a sick child. My daughter woke up yesterday with a fever, sore throat and nasty cough. By mid-afternoon it was evident nobody was going anyplace today. I started her on meds to help relieve her fever and body aches and gave her plenty of fluids. It seemed like we were making some headway but then in the middle of the night she wandered down to my room and crawled into bed with me. She was just burning up with fever. So we started all over again. This is any mother's nightmare. Our children are our world. We'd walk through fire for them, and when they are sick you wish it were you instead, at least I do. When Kaysie was little she was sick A LOT. New country new germs. The first two years she was here were awful. I knew the girls in the pediatrician's office on a first name basis. It seemed like we were in there once a month for a while. But my girl was quite a trooper. She doesn't get sick much these days, but when she does, she's still a trooper.
Today when I was doing my daily reading I started thinking about my plight. I have been very blessed these last few years. I am at the point in my career where if I need to take time for my family I do it without worry or regret. I have great health insurance and Kaysie can get top notch care when she is ill. Believe me I am very thankful for that. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have that security. Sadly, there are mothers in this country that aren't so lucky. When their kids are sick and they have to stay home from work, they might lose a day's wages. They might not have insurance, or they might not be able to afford the antibiotics that could mean the difference in their child getting better quicker. Being a single mother I think about those things. A sick child is a single mother's worst nightmare.
I wish the reality of this situation were different. There are also many children in this country who don't have a home and are at greater risk for illness. When these kids get sick it's an even bigger deal because they are sleeping in shelters, or on the streets. There are a couple of ways we all can make a difference in the lives of these children. If you are cleaning your closets out and maybe replacing linens for your bed or bathroom, consider donating them to a homeless or women's shelter. These places would be grateful for your donation, and just think, those sheets, blankets and towels might actually be keeping someone from being at risk for illness just by keeping them warm or allowing them to clean up. I heard on the Delilah show tonight that "The Company Store" (thecompanystore.com) has a "Buy one share one" campaign going on this week. If you purchase a comforter from them this week (and many of them are on sale - I've checked it out) they will donate a comforter to a homeless child in the US. They donated over 18,000 comforters last year. The best part is that the child gets to keep his or her comforter when they leave the shelter. What could be better than that? Keeping a child warm on a cold winter's night, and long after that.
My daughter is asleep in her warm cozy bed. It's cold and rainy in Portland tonight, and I'm certain that there is probably a little girl out there someplace who might also have the flu and not have a warm bed to sleep in, or a cozy blanket to keep her warm. Maybe by tomorrow night she might have a comforter or a clean set of sheets to sleep on and keep her warm simply because a stranger read a blog and made a difference. That would be this mother's wish.
Today when I was doing my daily reading I started thinking about my plight. I have been very blessed these last few years. I am at the point in my career where if I need to take time for my family I do it without worry or regret. I have great health insurance and Kaysie can get top notch care when she is ill. Believe me I am very thankful for that. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have that security. Sadly, there are mothers in this country that aren't so lucky. When their kids are sick and they have to stay home from work, they might lose a day's wages. They might not have insurance, or they might not be able to afford the antibiotics that could mean the difference in their child getting better quicker. Being a single mother I think about those things. A sick child is a single mother's worst nightmare.
I wish the reality of this situation were different. There are also many children in this country who don't have a home and are at greater risk for illness. When these kids get sick it's an even bigger deal because they are sleeping in shelters, or on the streets. There are a couple of ways we all can make a difference in the lives of these children. If you are cleaning your closets out and maybe replacing linens for your bed or bathroom, consider donating them to a homeless or women's shelter. These places would be grateful for your donation, and just think, those sheets, blankets and towels might actually be keeping someone from being at risk for illness just by keeping them warm or allowing them to clean up. I heard on the Delilah show tonight that "The Company Store" (thecompanystore.com) has a "Buy one share one" campaign going on this week. If you purchase a comforter from them this week (and many of them are on sale - I've checked it out) they will donate a comforter to a homeless child in the US. They donated over 18,000 comforters last year. The best part is that the child gets to keep his or her comforter when they leave the shelter. What could be better than that? Keeping a child warm on a cold winter's night, and long after that.
My daughter is asleep in her warm cozy bed. It's cold and rainy in Portland tonight, and I'm certain that there is probably a little girl out there someplace who might also have the flu and not have a warm bed to sleep in, or a cozy blanket to keep her warm. Maybe by tomorrow night she might have a comforter or a clean set of sheets to sleep on and keep her warm simply because a stranger read a blog and made a difference. That would be this mother's wish.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Change and Courage
Change and courage, two words that you might not think go together but really they do. Sometimes one cannot happen without the other, but more times than not, courage is an afterthought. I read a quote recently that said, "Courage is just fear that said it's prayers." I love that, and when you think about it, it's true. I think about some of the crazy foolish things I've done in my life, and after it's over I think, what ever possessed me to do that? I am NOT that brave, but somehow, I mustered up the courage and did it anyway, and lucky for me, lived to tell the tale.
The time that comes to my mind is the time I went with some of my colleagues from work and climbed Mt. Hood. I did not summit, but I went as far up as I had the nerve to go. It was a beautiful night, we started at about 3 in the morning under a full moon, and watched the sun come up over that beautiful mountain on the way up. It was just breath taking. Most of the guys on that trip made it to the summit, I took one look at that ice ladder to the top and said, "No way. I'm a single mother of a very young child, and I know getting up there will be no problem, it will be getting down that will do me in, so I sat down with the other woman on the climb and we had a very nice chat on that glorious mountain, and called it good enough." I guess that doesn't really qualify as courage unless you consider the fact that four other people were saying " Oh come on you made it this far... go the rest of the way." So I guess it took some amount of courage to say "No you go ahead."
There are other things, that I would consider taking courage, one would be when I adopted my daughter as a single parent. Now this is definitely a case where courage and change went hand in hand. There were a lot of prayers that were said at the time, and one "hissy fit" that I'm still not very proud of that happened just days before we were to leave for China. The hissy fit I threw at my dad, and I still feel bad about that, but he said some things that didn't make me very happy. It turned on my "Mama Bear" switch and the courage to stand up to him and say, "NO you made a promise to me and you are gonna keep it Buster!" must have come from my toes. I had never spoken to my father like that - ever.
Another incident of courage and change happened about five months before that day. I arrived in Portland on St. Patrick's Day 2001 to begin life a new. I only knew one person, but I had my stuff and a good job, and I just figured it would be ok. It was ok, but not for a long time. Would I change that decision, NOPE. Did it take courage? You betcha. Where did it come from? In a word...fear. Fear that I wouldn't be able to make it as a parent. I had to prove to myself that I could take care of business. I wasn't happy at the time and I needed a change. Things in my life were not going well. At the time it was a no brainer. I didn't have anything really holding me down so I took a chance on a BIG change, and hoped for the best. I said my prayers and got on that plane. My life has never been the same. Courage really is fear that said it's prayers.
Change on the other hand, just means that life is moving in a forward direction. Life is in a constant state of change. We learn early on to either roll with it or fight it. If we chose to fight it, life can be very hard. If we learn to roll with it, things seem to go much smoother. Easier said than done I know, but refer to the first part of this little essay. Our world is changing by the second. I'm not certain I like where things are headed. What I do know is that even though I can't stop it, I know deep down in my heart I have the courage to face whatever is coming. I've faced a mountain and being up high with no safety net, and I've faced parenthood, a new city and a new job all at the same time. The last three brought the most change into my life. I wouldn't give up any of it, and strangely enough would do it all over again.
What has brought change to your life? Did it take courage to face it? Where did that come from? How did you deal with it? What was the result? Would you do it all over again? I like to think that change makes life better. We learn lessons when things go badly, and even when things go well. If you just remember when you are faced with a big change, that courage is just fear that has said it's prayers you will be ok. You can muster some up I'm sure. Be fearful enough to ask your Higher Power for the strength to weather the storm and I'm pretty certain you will be amazed by what happens! Cheers!
The time that comes to my mind is the time I went with some of my colleagues from work and climbed Mt. Hood. I did not summit, but I went as far up as I had the nerve to go. It was a beautiful night, we started at about 3 in the morning under a full moon, and watched the sun come up over that beautiful mountain on the way up. It was just breath taking. Most of the guys on that trip made it to the summit, I took one look at that ice ladder to the top and said, "No way. I'm a single mother of a very young child, and I know getting up there will be no problem, it will be getting down that will do me in, so I sat down with the other woman on the climb and we had a very nice chat on that glorious mountain, and called it good enough." I guess that doesn't really qualify as courage unless you consider the fact that four other people were saying " Oh come on you made it this far... go the rest of the way." So I guess it took some amount of courage to say "No you go ahead."
There are other things, that I would consider taking courage, one would be when I adopted my daughter as a single parent. Now this is definitely a case where courage and change went hand in hand. There were a lot of prayers that were said at the time, and one "hissy fit" that I'm still not very proud of that happened just days before we were to leave for China. The hissy fit I threw at my dad, and I still feel bad about that, but he said some things that didn't make me very happy. It turned on my "Mama Bear" switch and the courage to stand up to him and say, "NO you made a promise to me and you are gonna keep it Buster!" must have come from my toes. I had never spoken to my father like that - ever.
Another incident of courage and change happened about five months before that day. I arrived in Portland on St. Patrick's Day 2001 to begin life a new. I only knew one person, but I had my stuff and a good job, and I just figured it would be ok. It was ok, but not for a long time. Would I change that decision, NOPE. Did it take courage? You betcha. Where did it come from? In a word...fear. Fear that I wouldn't be able to make it as a parent. I had to prove to myself that I could take care of business. I wasn't happy at the time and I needed a change. Things in my life were not going well. At the time it was a no brainer. I didn't have anything really holding me down so I took a chance on a BIG change, and hoped for the best. I said my prayers and got on that plane. My life has never been the same. Courage really is fear that said it's prayers.
Change on the other hand, just means that life is moving in a forward direction. Life is in a constant state of change. We learn early on to either roll with it or fight it. If we chose to fight it, life can be very hard. If we learn to roll with it, things seem to go much smoother. Easier said than done I know, but refer to the first part of this little essay. Our world is changing by the second. I'm not certain I like where things are headed. What I do know is that even though I can't stop it, I know deep down in my heart I have the courage to face whatever is coming. I've faced a mountain and being up high with no safety net, and I've faced parenthood, a new city and a new job all at the same time. The last three brought the most change into my life. I wouldn't give up any of it, and strangely enough would do it all over again.
What has brought change to your life? Did it take courage to face it? Where did that come from? How did you deal with it? What was the result? Would you do it all over again? I like to think that change makes life better. We learn lessons when things go badly, and even when things go well. If you just remember when you are faced with a big change, that courage is just fear that has said it's prayers you will be ok. You can muster some up I'm sure. Be fearful enough to ask your Higher Power for the strength to weather the storm and I'm pretty certain you will be amazed by what happens! Cheers!
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Chaos Comes and Goes
Chaos has reigned in my little apartment for about a month now. It all started when I got the dates of my mother's arrival for her holiday visit messed up. That night was like a tornado. We quickly tidied up and then dashed off to the airport. Chaos starts slow and gradually builds until it's unmanageable, and makes everyone crazy. I remember being fascinated by chaos theory. One minute everything is fine and then when you aren't looking BAM! Everything is crazy. That's exactly what happened that night. We were just going about our business and one little phone call later and my world was turned on it's head.
About a week later the Christmas Frenzy started. Endless Christmas music (my fault entirely because I love it), constant commercials for Hickory Farms and the latest greatest gadgets. We did brave the mall on at least two occasions, which seemed to whip my otherwise laid-back mellow daughter into a state of what can only be described as Christmas spirit on steroids. I ended up spending at least 45 minutes a day up at the workout room just to deal with what was building at home.
Christmas came in all it's glory and paper and craziness and then on the 28th my mom left for home. The cleaning up started shortly there after and ended on New Years Eve at about 8:30pm. I didn't think greeting the new year with a mess in my apartment set a very good precedent. So I cleaned up what I could and the rest, well it's still there. But that's ok.... This week has been a little hectic getting back on track with school, work, appointments and routine. The chaos is dying down...and hopefully will be getting tossed out with the last of the gift wrap. I have to do that. I am determined. While it doesn't probably look as bad as I think it does, it all needs to go. I am a libra and I need order and balance, and while the scale of my life is slightly tilted I can feel it edging toward the middle a little bit at a time.
What kind of chaos reigns in your world this evening? Are there things that spin out of control in your world that you want to go away? Make them. Stand firm, start a new. Create pathways of peace, even if all that amounts to is some nice smelling candles in your bathroom while you shower or take a soak. Then when you are in a tranquil state of mind decide what needs to get tossed out. Little by little. I'm starting with my desk. It's a mess. After that I'll tackle the larger messes. Before you and I know it, the chaos will be gone...for a while. Cheers!
About a week later the Christmas Frenzy started. Endless Christmas music (my fault entirely because I love it), constant commercials for Hickory Farms and the latest greatest gadgets. We did brave the mall on at least two occasions, which seemed to whip my otherwise laid-back mellow daughter into a state of what can only be described as Christmas spirit on steroids. I ended up spending at least 45 minutes a day up at the workout room just to deal with what was building at home.
Christmas came in all it's glory and paper and craziness and then on the 28th my mom left for home. The cleaning up started shortly there after and ended on New Years Eve at about 8:30pm. I didn't think greeting the new year with a mess in my apartment set a very good precedent. So I cleaned up what I could and the rest, well it's still there. But that's ok.... This week has been a little hectic getting back on track with school, work, appointments and routine. The chaos is dying down...and hopefully will be getting tossed out with the last of the gift wrap. I have to do that. I am determined. While it doesn't probably look as bad as I think it does, it all needs to go. I am a libra and I need order and balance, and while the scale of my life is slightly tilted I can feel it edging toward the middle a little bit at a time.
What kind of chaos reigns in your world this evening? Are there things that spin out of control in your world that you want to go away? Make them. Stand firm, start a new. Create pathways of peace, even if all that amounts to is some nice smelling candles in your bathroom while you shower or take a soak. Then when you are in a tranquil state of mind decide what needs to get tossed out. Little by little. I'm starting with my desk. It's a mess. After that I'll tackle the larger messes. Before you and I know it, the chaos will be gone...for a while. Cheers!
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Happy New Year
Happy New Year! I look forward to the new year every year. It is a clean slate - the ultimate do-over. We all get to start fresh on whatever it was that was "resolved to " the previous year or maybe you've thought of something new for this year. 2012 is going to be a big year for my little family. Firstly, 2012 in the lunar calendar is the year of the dragon. This is my daughter's big year. Hard to believe that she will be 12 this year. She was born under the full moon in 2000, the last year of the dragon. I'm pretty certain that was a big deal. Children born in the year of the dragon are thought to be very special. I'm a little partial, but I think she's pretty special anyway. She has gifts that I marvel at on a daily basis, and they continue to be opened like the best birthday or holiday presents. Secondly, and not quite so monumentally, I turn 50 this year. I'm not exactly where I thought I'd be at 50, but it's better than, as my dad would say, pushing up daisies, so I'll take it. I'm going to make it an exciting and productive year because over the last few months I've been working on some things personally, and now it's time to put them into action.
What are you working on or looking forward to in this new year? Is this going to be a good year for you and your family? I sure hope so. I heard something very wise on the radio yesterday. Most people go all out for New Years, and make resolutions that they stick with for a month or so and then they get broken and tossed aside like a cheap Christmas toy. The wisdom was this, start slow and take it one step at a time. Chances are your circumstances didn't crop up over night, it took time, and so it will take time to change that circumstance, whatever it is. I decided that for every successful workout I did I would throw a dollar bill in a canister. I'm not certain what I'm going to do with the money, but I'm thinking that I'd like that money to go to an organization that feeds people. What better way to celebrate a healthy habit than to make it benefit someone else who might be trying to do the same. The point is, baby steps. One day at a time. One workout at a time. One dollar at a time. That's how stuff gets done. Happy New Year!
What are you working on or looking forward to in this new year? Is this going to be a good year for you and your family? I sure hope so. I heard something very wise on the radio yesterday. Most people go all out for New Years, and make resolutions that they stick with for a month or so and then they get broken and tossed aside like a cheap Christmas toy. The wisdom was this, start slow and take it one step at a time. Chances are your circumstances didn't crop up over night, it took time, and so it will take time to change that circumstance, whatever it is. I decided that for every successful workout I did I would throw a dollar bill in a canister. I'm not certain what I'm going to do with the money, but I'm thinking that I'd like that money to go to an organization that feeds people. What better way to celebrate a healthy habit than to make it benefit someone else who might be trying to do the same. The point is, baby steps. One day at a time. One workout at a time. One dollar at a time. That's how stuff gets done. Happy New Year!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)